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Calm. Harmony.
Two words that don’t usually spring to mind when thinking about couples therapy, right?
While looking for articles this week I came across this annual word-of-the-year exercise in the Washington Post. They made a good case for why you might want to pick a new year’s “nudge” word instead of a resolution.
“Calm” was the aspirational category I picked, and as I looked through options in the word generator (linked below) I saw the word “Harmony.” Immediately I wondered what it would be like to have emotionally disconnected couples choose a nudge word.
I realized it can symbolize the kind of relationship both partners wish to nurture.
For example, a couple might choose "trust" or "kindness" as their nudge word. This single word becomes a focal point, reminding them of their shared goal and anchoring them when misunderstandings or conflicts arise. When emotions run high, a nudge word helps them pause and refocus on their intentions, creating space for meaningful connection rather than reactive responses.
For instance, when a partner feels dismissed, recalling their shared nudge word—perhaps "safe"—can inspire them to express their feelings in a way that invites closeness rather than distance. The word becomes a shorthand for the couple’s collective aspiration, helping them shift from defensiveness to vulnerability, from blaming to understanding. It’s not just a reminder of where they want to go but also a cue for how they want to get there—together, with intention and care.
Over time, a nudge word can become a touchstone for the couple, grounding their relationship in shared meaning and resilience. As bonding science says, it becomes a small yet profound way to "reach for each other," fostering the trust and connection that every relationship needs to thrive.
If you’d like to give it a try, this Nudge Word Generator might help your couples reflect on their values, intentions and hopes for the new year.
Now on with this week’s Ohio EFT Newsletter:
Radical Acceptance Can Help Build Emotional Resiliency.
by Joshua Coleman on January 6th, 2025
It can help us cope with painful events and find peace in the present moment.
Loneliness Linked To Heart Disease, Strokes And Infections.
by Poppy Koronka on January 6th, 2025
Scientists have found that some blood proteins increase with social isolation, raising the risk of several conditions and diseases.
How To Future-Proof Your Happiness In The New Year.
by Nina Agrawal on January 6th, 2025
Entering the new year pushes people into punishment mode. Instead, focus on what feeds you.
Our Next Ohio EFT Virtual Call Is Friday, January 31st.
by Ohio EFT on January 6th, 2025
Join us at 9:00am this coming Friday for our continuing online discussion about Emotionally Focused Therapy. We’ll be discussing the fifth move of the EFT Tango: Integrate/ Validate/ Reflect Process and “tie a bow.” I’ll have the link in the next edition of the newsletter.
7 Strategies To Strengthen Your Relationships In 2025.
by Catherine Pearson on January 6th, 2025
These tips can help you fortify your friendships and romantic partnerships in the year ahead.
The Best Advice Our Relationship Columnist Has Heard All Year.
by Elizabeth Bernstein on January 6th, 2025
“Quality Time Left” and other wisdom the Wall Street Journal’s social psychology writer found inspiring in 2024.
‘New Year, New You’ Doesn’t Work. Here’s How You Can Actually Improve Your Life.
by Oliver Burkeman on January 6th, 2025
Instead of resolving to become a different person in 2025, try setting achievable goals and embracing “radical doability.”
Are you fit for your age? Try This Fitness
Tuneup To Find Out.
by Chelsea Conrad on January 6th, 2025
Want to know if you’re as fit as most people your age?
The Washington Post asked top exercise experts for easy, DIY ways to test five of the most essential elements of fitness.
These elements are noteworthy because each has been linked to longevity, meaning our balance, mobility, grip strength, stamina and overall fitness could influence just how long and well we live.
Try these five simple tests and see how you measure up against a benchmark of what’s healthy for your age group. Don’t fret if your results fall a bit short. The article also gives you easy exercises to help you fine-tune every aspect of your fitness and make this your fittest year yet.
How To Calm Your Mind With Breathing, According To Science.
by Richard Sima on January 6th, 2025
Breathwork practices and slowing our breath can alleviate stress and improve mood.
